Cold feet tattoo and Iron Maiden
Filed Under (What fresh hell is this) by Monkee on 21-05-2008
Living in a smaller town where the winter weather makes it hard to travel to far I am rather limited as far as shopping. Usually this is ok as most of the places that I need to are close. I avoid Walmart with all I have. I hate that nexus of the retarded, the morbidly obese (not just regular obese) and the mouth-breathers. Walmart is terrible, bla bla and Ill write more about it later but this story isn’t about the store its the horror before I get in.
As usual the parking lot was a bittersweet melange of people that appear to be the cast from a zombie movie and folks that got of the short bus. I drive slowly as to not hit the 1951 Hudson parked in two handicapped spaces. I pass the VW buss with the broken windows covered with cardboard. I finally park and walk in.
I was at this store a few weeks ago when the weather was a bit more pleasant. This time I am greeted by a sign that states no shoes, no shirt no service. WTF, I haven’t seen those in decades. Why you ask? Because people know better. What kind of mindless troglodytes are you catering to that you need to remind them to wear footwear and cover the Iron Maiden tatt on their nipple?
Sweat feathery Buddha, its 10 degrees outside. Do people just want to get all freaky at Walmart. Does the low prices engender stripping. Do the red vests just make people randy.
Yes they do. I shopped for laundry detergent and kitchen garbage bags. I did this sans shirt. I will not apologize, for it was sexy and dare I say liberating.








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I have witnessed people doing similar things at our local walmart. The real issue is whether or not you ran people down with your shopping cart while shopping topless for laundry detergent and trash bags!
So what if I did
Just wondering if you’re going to be fixing your entre card widget?
No I am not, I am done with them! Once every two weeks they find a new way to screw me.
My former hometown was known for its’ meth problem. I always found it ironic that Wal-Mart - the obvious choice for the meth addicted to shop for their midnight house painting supplies and what all, seemed bereft of the effects of meth. Not one person in that place could move beyond an aisle clogging snail’s pace. In Wal-Mart, I think the meth should be offered at the door. By an old man in a blue vest. So people can get their crap and dart out.
That might work